sixteenth of may

Today was the first day of our halfyearlys. Great start, only arrived a tad late ):
So the exams were English, Geography and History. I obviously didn't have the time to study for eng, so I was pretty much screwed. For geo and hist, I forgot my class. How embarrasing... I guess the eng was easiest ? I full studied in the break for geo and hist. Result ? Mindblanked. Facepalms right there, watch me ace your favourite subject.

During dinner, I was watching this reality show. Today's problem was that a man made his woman wait for him for five years. In the beginning, her mother won't let them be together. She made impossible standards to achieve and therefore the guy left with the idea of returning in a position to satisfy them. The guy came back and it was too late, she was engaged already and marrying in two months.
In the end, mum asked me, "if you were the girl, would you wait ?" I put you into the place of the man and i thought. If it was for you, I would. I would patiently wait for those years to pass. I said yes to mum, she said I was a crazy girl, I would seriously attempt suicide like the girl on the show. I thought about it, if you left me a note saying you will be back after a certain amount of time, I would wait. I wouldn't physically die, but hell yeah emotionally and psychologically. The motivation would be prolly chat history and albums...

I cried so much listening to this episode. It reminded me greatly of you. I remembered how you said in the future, when we grow up, we would go our separate ways. But you will become wealthy and search for me. I also remember how you said you'd keep me in your heart and soul in mushiie. Wish I could feel the warmth of thoses words being said to me again. Yeah, it's funny how I still remembered this, even though he helped me dump the memories already. Can you tell me why I remember them ? Anyway, I guess the reason of the fall was lack of communication in oppa's words. Yeahs the stupidity is still in me I guess. I really hope the result of my decision to not look back is in the favour of you. Because if it isn't, tell me, I'm willing to go back any day.

I miss you <3 ...